I can’t tell you the last time I had things or even wanted them.

I have always needed people but my brain has always limited me. It creates a barrier for reasons I have only recently come to understand. They call it PTSD.

It is a very bizarre thing to know the eternally living and have no choice in it. To know that I understand things on a level that has always labeled me, “intense and different.” Cause I am. My theory is that there is a piece of me that was cut off my body and immediately preserved in formaldehyde. A Nazis plastic surgeon’s souvenir.

Sick right? Real twisted. But it explains a lot.

Like we all want to believe that people, especially doctors, have the best of intentions. But many of them absolutely do not.

I have been to a healer before he had a medical doctor title but he actually addressed my issues. That said so much about him and people like him should receive many blessings.

When you can heal, you have a true gift. I am not a healer, I have different gifts.

This is why we all need each other, because we all have tiny pieces of a much larger gift: and that gift is love and love is G-d without a doubt or debate necessary.

For a myriad of reasons, restricting speech through censorship is bullshit.

First of all, English is not, has not and never will be my first language. Nothing in my history is English. It is a filthy language so all of it is trash.

It is not my mother. Not my tongue. Not my blood. To me, it is a language of oppression. That rips out the soul and identity of a person. A language of exploitation, subjugation and deterioration. Economic abuse.

There are many many many languages in this country and on this earth. Tribal languages that build solid identity and understanding of place. English is a foreign language.

You don’t get to stalk me

No one does

Don’t send me money and gifts

Don’t pretend you are doing me any favors

Don’t lie about me and our relationship

Don’t say you were close to me; it isn’t true

I have never been close to you unless I say it

Most people know nothing of me or my life

They have heard stories, rumors, gossip

But what G-d has done with my life despite decades of horrific treatment is the incredible piece

Like to have been able to do anything that I have proves that there is a G-d with endless love and mercy

It is true. So stop judging me and start realizing that you have never had anything to do with it as much as I haven’t had anything to do with it.

It is always the love within someone that moves them. Know Love? It ruins your life it fucks up your plans.

I want to make something very clear: I am not trans nor have I ever been or considered it my identity.

When I left my ex instead of telling everyone that it was because he didn’t actually want to marry me, he lied and told people it was because I desired to transition from female to male.

Wow! That is So fucked up!

Now you all can clearly see that the abuses I suffered with him were in fact incomprehensible.

He raped, abused, used me and then lied through his teeth to keep me around.

But you know he is the one with the balls, right?

I have a problem with women who tear other women down. They are black holes sucking anyone around them into their pits of misery.

They use money to manipulate and abuse. They are consumed by their own insecurities. They attempt to destroy other women through lies. They abuse men in their lives and threaten them to get their way.

They don’t care and are entirely selfish. They are blinded by hate and greed. And choose to use their power only to benefit themselves.

In the world, they are “likeable,” because they have resources. But they only intend to hurt you and take from you.

I know who you are because I can see the black holes over your faces whether you know this about yourself or not.

Wanna know why so many white people have a problem with Ethnic Studies being taught to them and their children?

Well, let’s see…

First of all, it teaches history from the perspective of historically oppressed populations. It allows a voice for those who have been horribly brutalized and oppressed by systemic racism. It exposes the evils of theories of “white superiority.”

It forces introspection and self-contemplation, it confronts mislead ideologies. In essence, it gets the student to ask questions of self like, “ who am I? And how have I benefited, contributed, been exploited in these systems?”

It makes a person think critically about the lives and circumstances of those around them. It challenges internal conflicts. It exposes deep and dark areas of our personal histories and forces us to confront our own evils, our sins against self and others.

It is not a bad thing, it helps you know who you are and what got you to where you are. It helped me to understand my spiritual nature and where it came from. It helped me to realize that economics have played a crucial role in establishing class hierarchies in society. That white men have benefited entirely from exploiting women and even their own children and are terrified of retribution for their vile misdeeds. And continue to create systems of total abuse for their benefit.

Why? Fear.

They are afraid and lie to maintain their own power. It is not G-d’s plan it is THEIR plan.

But what happens when it all comes crashing down? When they are confronted with their own lies and have to pay reparations for the damages they have consistently inflicted on their fellow human beings?

Here is the deal, there are a lot of promises that were made and need to be upheld. A lot of callous lies they told out of religious perversion to exploit local resources, dehumanize, rape and rob. It is true and unavoidable.

That is what really pisses rich white people off about ethnic studies, is that they are guilty of not living up to their word and judgement day sooncome.

Hospital are corrupt in America, but Bellevue has to be one of the worst.

It is awful what the staff there is allowed to do to people. They drug people against their will. Remove children from their parents. Keep immigrants for months on end. All to justify their own ignorance and inhumanity.

The staff admitted that they do not properly report incidents out of fear of retribution by higher ups.

Another staff member nonchalantly said, “If you don’t get all of your stuff back, just fill out a form and the hospital will cut you a check.”

I am sorry—what?! When I left, I was handed a paper bag and their clothing, one shoe and a broken phone and told that was all of my property. They have security cameras, it clearly was not what I entered the hospital with. The staff steal the property of patients by putting it into a pool of things and hoping that the patient just doesn’t question and accepts their deprivatity.

Patients who have been abused, molested and tortured are then reduced again to lies told by the staff to make money off of stealing their property.

They knew I was from another state. They took my son away from me and were attempting to immediately put him into the foster care system and up for adoption (human trafficking) while they did not care for me. They did not care for my son and they made money off of exploiting us entirely.

I went there to treat a broken foot. They held me against my will for ten days. They shot me full of benzodiazepines and forced me to sleep for two days. Told me if I did not take the medication they prescribed me, I could not leave. Medication that the longer I take gives me side effects worse than what I was experiencing. They diagnosed me with nothing that I didn’t already know.

The psychological department is full of bias and disgusting white women who do not understand the needs of anyone. They are foolish people with very clear objectives of denying the humanity of people they clearly do not understand. They violated my HIPPA rights by providing information to a woman who stalks me and has attempted countless times to exhaust and abuse me.

If I would have acted out of their idea of good behavior, they would have drugged me again and again forced me to sleep in a padded room on the floor and electroshocked me— I saw it happen to other patients. So incredibly disturbing.

They stole my phone the doctors went through all of my possessions and told me about what I had to use it against me in therapy sessions.

They especially mistreat immigrants. There were people there for months with immigrant status that were given no clear answers and told it was for the best.

Also, they do not separate men and women. I was forced to be subjected to multiple attempts from clearly mentally unwell patients to comments of rape and sexual abuse. For four solid days, I had to tell a Russian man who was out of his mind to stay away from me. He would grab me and scream at me that he wanted to fuck me. He would attempt to follow me to my room in the women’s section. Relentlessly. He was determined to get his will and if I would have slipped at all, he would have waited for that moment and done something horrible to me…

What?

I left that hospital with no child, no property and no care. They didn’t even show me or discuss my foot X-rays.

This is not healthcare it, it is insurance fraud on behalf of the hospital. It is abuse and involuntary psychological experimentation on people for the sickness of those in charge.

Fuck that place. They deserve a class action lawsuit.

Here is the deal: you don’t get to kill me or my family.

You just don’t. Just because you suck balls and you fucked up and you chose wrong doesn’t mean anything about me.

You don’t get to tell me or other people who I am or what I can do. You don’t get to dictate my life.

I am a big fan of you looking in the mirror at how horrible you have acted when getting chance after chance after chance to not go to assrape prison.

Yea, assrape prison—you deserve it. You are a predator and a self-entitled bitch boy who took advantage of a person with a clear open wound and then pretended constantly that you were the victim.

People in prison are really good at judging motives and character, actually. Most have been screwed over so badly their entire lives by broken systems and backstabbers. So they have learned to observe, ask the questions that get answers that reveal hidden truths, and they stop caring about judgement beyond G-d—cause it really doesn’t matter.

You don’t care about me beyond your own motives. That is beyond sad because you were lied to and bribed by losers, and you actually took the money that sold your soul.

But I really question whether or not you had a soul ever.

I don’t want to talk to you or see you again because you let everyone down, not just me.

Yes, processing centers. For those of us who understand that new terms for old theories become standard language, we know that processing centers are the new concentration camps.

You take people you suspect of being some delusional title of “illegal” or “potentially criminal” and send them hundreds of miles away from friends and family in places like Michigan.

Make them wear uniforms to distinguish their levels of supposed criminality. Force them to eat vile food.

You abuse them for nothing. Deprive them of due process. Turn them into slave labor or deport them.

This is Fascism it is UnAmerican. It is criminal. It is wrong. It is straight out of a “Hitler’s Handbook For New and Returning Nazis.”

If you support this, you are turning a blind eye to the absolute destruction of YOUR OWN rights. You are choosing the destruction of this country and a poisonous hatred and fear that will consume you entirely.

Wake up and stay woke cause only the devil wants to catch people sleeping and the devil DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU.

Don’t draft our children.

Don’t send them to fight your imagined war.

Don’t take them away from us and send them back in caskets.

That is not freedom. That is deception.

You eek of false claims and propaganda to perpetuate your false ideologies.

You deny freedom and claim it to be peace.

You ignore the voices of those who hear, those who know, those who see.

For what? What purpose?

No child should be forced to be reprogrammed and deprived of their identity to become a drone and a murderer.

World War II left a curse and a stain on all those involved. Boys that left if they returned, spent their lives running from a demon army in their heads and took it out on those closest to them and their communities.

Blood for blood—eye for eye—tooth for tooth? Think again. There is no honor in that.

The answer is no war and definitely no war on the American People!